DOH HOHOHO YOU DON’T EXIST.
this week was really intense with all the tests and stuff and tensions and which really made me weird and depressed and strange.
tuesday was pretty annoying because we have 5 hours of lessons after a 1 hour break (strahan has 1/2 hour break followed by 7 hours of lessons so I really shouldn’t be complaining :x)
wednesday was short as always and I spent the whole of art club trying to design a poster for the faccomm interview. and ming kang didn’t come which made it boring. meh
–
today we got chased out of school by the security guard who was in this hilariously small golf-cart thing and played this weenie siren haha
we went to bowl at dexter’s condo which was seriously fun, I never expected to pull off that “3 PEOPLE BOWL IN THE SAME ALLEY AT THE SAME TIME” shit at all in my entire life, let alone 8 times in 20 minutes haha
OH and we discussed see² stuff before that and I actually made contributed 😀 I feel so good haha
–
but there was the faccomm interview on thursday which was I don’t knoww 🙁
I spent the entirety of the previous night awake (3.5 packets of coffeeeeee) doing PI and the portfolio and the poster which kind of made me extremely unstable both in the mind and body 🙁 I think the poster I made was nice looking enough but I screwed up my interview and my voice was shaking from all the stress aargh! I don’t think I made it in! I just hope that my poster impressed them well enough and that they accept based on who is best for the role they chose because then I’d stand a higher chance than lixian and yyc because only 3 people are running for pub I/C and that gives me pretty good chances. I think I sounded sincere enough in the first question but I gave really REALLY short answers at the rest aargh I think I was unimpressive 🙁
so anyway the interviewer asked me “what qualities do you think you have that are better than the others’” and I tio stunned
<seriously?! how am I supposed to answer that without sounding like a douche?>
so anyway I said “um no offence but I don’t want to ummmmmmmmmmmmm beat them down or anything but ummmm I think I’m more extroverted and open than them! which is an important (5 sec pause) virtue. yeah!” oh fuck me 🙁
if I don’t get in I guess I wouldn’t feel so bad if not for that tiny sliver of hope beneath my heart which would make everything hurt so much.
–
however what made me feel really heartened and made this effort all worthwhile would be how much people actually care about me:
mingkang, marie, shungit, qilin, strahan, quite a lot of people who I forgot and my brother cheered me on, lixian sent me an sms cheering me on and telling me not to worry about the call that I was supposed to get but didn’t and eventually did, derek followed me to print my portfolio and waited for me till the interview ended when he’d usually rather be at home, yuchuan printed my poster and PI and other people gave me advice (which didn’t help much sorry 🙁 )
however the most amazing and unexpected wishes came from Bryan. he brought me aside and told me to have self-confidence and believe in myself. to hear this coming from the most hilarious guy in class really really means a lot! I think he read my blog so HELLO BRYAN YOU ARE AWESOME 🙂 and he told me that he thought that I was the most suitable person to be a CT rep (which I don’t think is true) which really really made me feel much better! so thank you so very much bryan!
–
if I don’t get in I think lixian will which would be very good because honestly, I think she’s the best for this job and not me. sorry yuchuan I love you you can be assistant ct rep 🙁
–
I should be more appreciative of how people trust and like and have faith and care for and are nice to and have fun around and support me but it always slips out of my mind either due to surprise or astonishment :[
–
I could say so much but what’s done is done
we should move on and look to the future
SO GREEEEEEEN KING HERE I COME >)
Leave a Reply