The world rocks slightly, quite the contrary to … like when you lie in bed after a day of fun in the sea.
Thoughts fight to prioritise themselves (although this is rather normal for me) and your subconscious opens its floodgates upon the rest of the brain and you start smiling for no apparent reason.
You feel slightly happy, glad because there’s nothing to give a damn about any more. The beer can’s empty though. That’s a damn worth giving. You want happy, no beer no happy.
They badger you to start walking because we’re checking out of the chalet now. Getting up is a little tricky. Staggering left, staggering right, your footing is never sure. Damn still not given; noone’ll get hurt.
When eating? Still woozy. Not sure if it’s because I didn’t sleep or if it’s because I’m drunk.
Home? Still woozy. Thank God I live in the East. Tell mum “GUESS WHO’S DRUNK! :D”, take much needed cold shower.
Slam on bed. 7 hour nap, ho.
[I’ve gotta stop writing and alt-tabbing, dampens motivation like crazy]
12:30 PM (4th Dec, Sunday) – [Without a purpose – On the coach]
Heading to Bama?!
It’s a 2hr ride then a 3hr trip up the oazdjkasld mountains, really hope I don’t crap or piss my pants.
Argh bumpyyy. [Messily scrawled words, the bus isn’t the best place to write stuff]
—
11:15 PM [Room 0211, Bama Holiday Villa]
Here’s what we did today: Woke at 5:40AM, waited on bus from 6-6:30. Got breakfast: Croissant + Apple + Egg + Mineral Water [we were rushing so the hotel prepared this for us]
Headed to airport which was a totally unexpected thang. [No itinerary for the kids, folks]
Took plane to Nanning, arrived at 11AM.
Ate at a family restaurant, took a 5hr trip. Luckily, I slept through the most of it so I didn’t need to take a crap.
We went to this totally massive cave round the mountains, some 百 _ _ [百灵洞 I think] Tour guide argued with cave guide. Was so cold, could see my own breath!
HIGH EXPECTATIONS ASIAN FATHER APPROVES
Went out of the mountains, and round the city to a restaurant. Food was meh, drank a lot of rice wine though. Tasted weird but strong as hell. Wanted to see how long I’d take to get drunk. (I didn’t haha).
We’re waking at 7AM tomorrow (buffet :D), they said there’s more time to rest (?). I’m dead beat now.
Missing the Internet and the guys.
And 6 more days of this. Meeting old people? I’d rather go to a farm (or CIP).
Toilets aren’t too bad though, and travelling gives you time to rest and recollect…
We’re at the same hotel. Heard tomorrow’s ride is 10 hours long. Yikes.
Miss the Internet blargh. Should’ve brought laptop. Damn.
Today morning we went down to the lakeside to have a river tour. It was pretty damn freezing so I wore 3 layers.
Then we went over to the government-owned version. There were a few really cute gals in the area. Our guide was pretty cute too, but our tour leader was kind of a dick and kept interrupting her.
We rowed through huge-ass caves which is something you definitely don’t see every day. There was a majesty in the rocks that enthralls and enraptures and big words. The way you could just pass through these areas with relative ease is something that really wows.
They kept trying to match rock formations to various animals and gods. Pish.
We had an hour long lunch at this deserted restaurant. Yup. -> It became bloody hot.
Then we had an hour-long trip to the 水晶洞 which was a pretty huge cave with strangely shaped rock formations they claimed were crystal formations.
Well, they probably were but didn’t look like it. [The colours were from lights]
awwww so cute <3
Was joking throughout the entire tour with the twins.
Went out and bought a hairpin and 2 slingshots. Seems [sic] like shitty gifts though. Will buy better ones tomorrow.
Spent another 2 damn hours heading back, had dinner at the same place we had it yesterday. Was rather shit though.
Having been in Beijing a year ago, I’d say that the two places are pretty fuckin’ [COMPLETELY UNNECESSARY EXPLETIVE MUCH] similar. But surprisingly, this place [Bama] has better toilets and the people are awesome. Bama has way too many caves though.
The bus-rides seem like some off-road derby; the driver keeps attempting to overtake other cars in the 2-lane roads which are badly maintained and stuff. Soya bean milk is still unsweetened, and breakfast still sucks as much.
Well, during the trip I was wondering about tradition… When we grow up, will our traditional foods die along with the older generation? We’re too busy studying [LOL] to learn what ingredients go with what, and we’d most likely turn to the Internet for recipes. Death of tradition… Weirdly, I feel bad about it.
10:05 PM
We’re going to Guilin tomorrow. It’s probably gonna be cold as hell, 6-7 degrees Celsius. The stuff there’s gonna be better than Bama’s. Yeaah.
I’ve just returned from China and it was bloody cold. Like wayyy too bloody cold.
We went to Guangzhou (3 hours 40 mins) and then took a flight to Nanning (1 hour 40 mins) then had a tour to Bama then Yangshou (10 hours travel time) then Guilin (which sucks) then took a flight back to Guangzhou (1 hour) then took a plane back to Singapore (too lazy to count).
It was some (very) loose form of meditation I guess. Every single day, I slept at 12 and woke at 6-7. Which was fine with me because early to bed early to rise makes one healthy wealthy (uh) and wise!
Except for the last few days at some rural village. The hotel (which markets itself as a resort) was pretty good except for the fact that it had no heater and that the temperature was below 10 degrees.
I didn’t bring my laptop, so I was pulled off the Internet for 11 days, and got to interact with my cousins! (Why are my cousins so good-looking. Why is every girl I know so good-looking asdjfahsd) We 游山玩水’d so it meant I got to look at faraway things which means my eyes will be even more powerful.
Why does every single girl in the universe have bangs?
–
And I watched 《那些年，我们一起追的女孩》 today, with my bro, because the tickets were only $6 and additionally he said the movie had references to masturbation so of course I had to watch it. But it was really good. And the ending made me tear up a bit but because I’m a guy I can’t do that. And the female lead was pretty cute.
I’ll post what I wrote in my diary while I was in China soon.
~
The seniors had their prom! We’ll be seniors next year. Oh dear.
Sometimes I regret not taking up any leadership positions. Pfft.
Every time an event/meeting/hang-out/gathering ends, we all find ourselves saying good-byes and thank yous.
But I think I’m the only poor sod who ever waves as I climb the escalator, as the train pulls away from the station, as the bus trundles off. It’s always the same; I look through the glass and the other party never waves back. Maybe it’s awkward to stare, maybe it’s embarassing.
Yesterday (well two nights ago) was really fun. I was leaving the station and the 4S2 guys were all waving like madmen, like they were drowning except that they were on land and they didn’t need help with anything, just waving. It was silly, of course. But it was nice. I felt proud that I was in 4S2, when hours before I’d rather stay at home.
Yet another one of those little things in life I guess.
–
Also. I got this in my email. It’s a question on my tumblr.
Not only do I like your blog (haha I found it) but I also am OBSESSED with you secretly. Ok here we go.. I got this idea from a Tumblr spam I got once lol.. I think you like me too and you were always too shy to admit it :3 go to crushmatches(dõt)com (wtf it wont let me link regular) and make an account there. Then look up the profile ‘gottagetme19’ (me obviously) I left body pictures.. if you can guess who I am hit me up and we’ll hang soon. You need a C C but its free
Whoever wrote this, you are a cunt. Jeez. The unbolded words signify when I stopped believing what this was about.
WHY DID I EVEN BELIEVE THIS IN THE FIRST PLACE.
GOD.
So November ends with heart-breaks, great events and tons of gatherings. Much more eventful than I thought! Looking forward to later!
See² was a highlight of my high school years; it holds a lot of memories (desk-moving, towel-flipping and human foosball included) and it’s where I got most my CIP hours from.
Although the CIP hour thing is pretty much irrelevant this year, it still holds a place close to my heart as that event which only I and a few select others may have the fortune to discover and enjoy, much like that brandless candy you find on shelves that no one buys but tastes like heaven. People have left (I still insist that it’s a damn shame 🙁 ) while others have joined and familiar faces are all around. Everyone’s friendly and chummy and Ray Yan’s seriously too cool.
And I’m thankful for being put into Logistics. While I’m pretty shit at listening to presentations about concepts, I love running around to settle orders. Perfect for me. And I got to work with fantastic people. Like Edmund, Vanessa, Derrick and Clarice. And I have to thank Clarice for letting me “practice” how to speak to the opposite sex. It’s easier than I thought. So thanks. Childish! It’s nice to have female friends because they aren’t complete assholes like guys are.
But I’m departing with a hint of sorrow. We might be having a hiatus of 5-10 years, and we might tackle see² when we’re in uni. As ridiculous as it may sound, it’s a good way for us to achieve recognition. But will everyone be willing to take up this commitment after all this time? I can’t be sure myself.
I can’t really ramble on about see² so I’ll ramble about this. I tried to say hi today. To give me a, you know, sense of closure… After all, she’s changed me so much into the person I am now. To not know her personally would be ungrateful, right?
But… I couldn’t do it. She had too many friends and although I caught her eye once or twice, I didn’t have the courage to raise my arm to even wave. I was so nervous that I was fighting the urge to puke. I walked past her thrice, the last one after 15 minutes of contemplation.
And I gave up.
I was glum for my lack of balls. But I’m letting fate run it’s course this time: if I’m fated to know her personally, then the moment will present itself. I’m not going to do anything. Yes, I probably still like her, but I’m not smitten any more. I’ll let go and see where this takes me.
I suddenly feel free, free to go completely gaga over another person, free to talk to any girl I want without having my balls shrinking, free to talk to anyone who wants to talk.
And once again, another chapter ends: two major parts of my life are probably over. I should look for better things in life now. Like Skyrim. Or Saints Row 3. Or MW3.
Really tired. And frustrated. This day had so much potential to be memorable and a highlight, and yet all we could talk about was the fate of the damn future.
The talk’s definitely essential. But argh the nice seniors were there, we were. But maybe it was unavoidable. We had people leaving after a while, discussion became slow, I couldn’t keep my story going and people started to become restless. Everything became bleak and it sucked because my feet were sodden from water bombs (thanks a lot, edmund and clarice sheesh) and I was cold and tired.
When you’re tired you either get very high or just stay grumpy for no damn reason. And when you’re tired and cold and wet you can’t actually get high.
The talk was bleak. About the future again. Don’t get me wrong, I love these guys. I love this event. I met new people, everything went smoothly and it was awesome. But if all we could talk about was how it’s gonna die and how we cannot save it. Denial, yup. But don’t send me off telling me that my hometown’s going to explode.
This morning, I told someone that he was being pretentious. He got really sarcastic and defensive about it and said “don’t project”. I wasn’t even arguing with him; I was concerned. I gave an actual fuck. And all he could do was to say that I’m the one being stuck-up. Ironic, much. I’m not sore about it. I’m disappointed that I didn’t even try to argue back, just because he’s done me favours. I’m disappointed that he didn’t even bother to listen. I’m disappointed because that comeback was an unfair accusation and denial of what’s going on. I hope he understood my intent.
There are a million other ways this event could’ve ended, and I don’t understand why it had to end this badly. Hope the AAR offers some sort of closure.
Two prisoners look out the window; one looks down and sees the mud; the other looks up and sees a field of flowers.
Started off the day rather badly. Turned out that the certificates we went to print had a simple huge glaring typo where “contribute” was mistyped as “contriubte”. $63 down the drain, but we can’t really blame anyone, right?
Then we had like no halal food. There were 5 muslim participants, and we all expected each other to buy the halal food instead, so it ended up with Ray Yan and me heading over to McD’s to buy 5 Fillet O’ Fish meals. Everyone was blaming each other but it was really ultimately my fault for being the food I/C and not doing my job. The participants were exceedingly nice and concerned about us so I felt great.
Dinner was when the true wonderfulnessessity happened. We headed down to this posh cheap posh place to fill our stomachs. Although Edmund wanted to liven the atmosphere and entertain the other 2 at our table with stories, they were deemed too lame (seriously he just made one up) so I decided, this is too crunk fo’ sho. So Dexter and I tried to talk a bit about what happened the previous day, but I remembered Ray Yan saying something about not telling them. So I went over to Ray Yan’s table.
Then we happened to move on to Wong jokes, which I completely forgot. And somehow I started talking about my JC life. It was pretty goddamn liberating. No, it was awesome as fuck.
It’s obvious that everyone loves to talk about themselves. When you get a small audience who’s willing to hear about every single crap that’s shooting outta your mouth, fueled by the sugar rush from cheap free-flow dispensed Pepsi, it’s probably the most wonderful feeling in the world (well I technically am a lonely virgin so I wouldn’t know what other feelings there are that I’m missing out on). I talked about Health and Fitness. I talked about the scars from windsurfing. I talked about my infatuation. I talked about things my friend did to help when I was infatuated, and how I “failed to Carpe Diem“. I talked about how I noticed that she kept looking back whenever I looked at her. They gave me tips on how to say “Hi”. I talked about how much I’ve changed since the start of the year.
And, well, the best thing was that everyone wanted to listen. When you have a very small group, people keep fighting to answer or to speak. This medium-sized group was actually interested, about the simple, screwed up life I lead. No one interrupted, people were laughing at appropriate moments and they were all focused. About the things I keep to myself because I find them narcissistic to yub about. About things that I’d never say in public because they’re rather different from the norm. And I’ll tell you honestly, that I’ve never felt this great in a long time. This seriously made my entire day.
I’ve noticed that sometimes I get into the mood to yabber about stuff, and I tend to get animated and entertain others when doing so, which I really love to do.
So that was my short-lived blubbering about the day. I don’t think I’ll ever get a chance to have such a life-sharing session again, but in case people ask for a continuation tomorrow (HIGHLY UNLIKELY I MIGHT ADD), I’ll make it less about things that’ve happened and more of what has changed. The morals of the stories. To be more inspiring, I guess. Ha. Thanks, people. 🙂
Next time when someone talks, I’ll listen carefully. It’s the best anyone can do, I guess.
Okai, my com overheated on my lap this is bad my children might be retarded.
It was fun for the most of the morning, when I had to romp around the LT@SRC just setting up the food and wearing a blazer and a long-sleeved collared shirt with a tie and just playing with the walkie-talkie. I like wearing formal attire. It makes me feel important, and I can roll up my sleeves and go “IT’S BUSINESS TIME!”
The tea was kind of bad which made me wonder why I decided to choose such bad choices of food (Baked Spinach Quiche, Mini Soon Kueh, Mini Cheese Bun etc etc). The packed lunch was surprisingly okay.
Meanwhile I’ve gotten the nickname of “childish” from Clarice because we were playing around with the talkies. I am such a wuss.
And the OPs room has a nostalgic look to it. Must be the way things are arranged.
On to serious stuff.
See²’s been an important part of my CCA life thus far. I’ve been a part of it for 5 years, and I can safely say that I’m a veteran at this. (hoho)
I’ve seen this event from various positions:
As a worker in Sec 1 and 3 (I will not label myself with something as demeaning as saikang), my primary motivation was just screwing around with Derek while preparing for the games and stuff. I had no real connection to the event.
As a participant in Sec 2, it was incredibly boring for me and I believe I bailed on the last day, which was quite honestly something I regret rather much.
As a facilitator in Sec 4, I wanted to see how it was like to facilitate. Primarily to meet people. I ended up neglecting my duties and going over to the people I knew most of the time, which is making me hate myself right now.
As a member of the Organising Team now, I wanted to help make this year’s See², well, “the best ever”. To make a terrific comeback. To raise a phoenix from the ashes. But we didn’t manage to.
Of course, as part of human nature, we blamed teachers for being too restrictive. While this was, in part, rather true, Li Sheng had a little talk with us during dinner. He said to us (directed at Ray Yan) that he talked with the previous OS (Chin Ying was there so it was rather funny) and the previous one and the one before that about the problem of See² being far too… redundant.
So we were all hunching at the food court, over plates of hokkien mee, spaghetti and char kway teow (the only things anyone ever eats there anyway), listening to his critical views.
At first I didn’t really believe that it was so. I mean, low participant counts are the teacher’s fault right? Then it hit me that, well, most participants were forced to join this and they don’t really gain anything from it since NOTHING ever gets solved anyway.
We were faced with 3 options for this problem: Fix it (what we’ve thought we’ve been doing), Ignore it (what we’ve actually been doing) or Kill it. We’ve been keeping See² afloat mainly because of a sense of duty, and not because of it main reason which was to create proposals to solve infocomm club problems. We’re trying to keep this afloat so as to hopefully have the same amount of fun we did as participants (which wasn’t actually a lot).
We had a general consensus (actually it was Li Sheng’s idea) that See² should actually grab a proposal (frankly all proposals are the same; camps, competitions, workshops), and make it a reality. Make it something that people would actually join to save their clubs, and not some ol’ get-together where everyone nods their heads and do nothing.
We also agreed (with Li Sheng’s view) that See² should move to a different location. Like a University, Polytechnic or a corporate location. This way we could appear more professional and get expert support at the same time.
If we’re desperate (seeing that participant counts are dropping like flies I can safely say that we should be desperate) we could move the OT entirely to the JC side completely considering that we’re the only people who know about this problem and actually care about it.
That guy’s a genius.
Still, I don’t think it’s a pity to have joined the See² OT. It is a pity only joining it this year and nothing much has been done, but it’s definitely not a shame. The people are sweet and I get to feel useful and professional. Haha. I’d clarify my words but my laptop’s out of battery and I can’t be assed to get my charger.
We had the leadership workshop on Tuesday and Wednesday.
For Tuesday we had lots of lectures which were somewhat useful because of guidelines and stuff (otherwise pretty damn boring) and laser tag which was rather underwhelming because no one could tell who was shooting who and if you shot anyone.
For Wednesday we had a “positive psychology” workshop which was basically common sense and the adventure camp. I was supposed to go with the sports CCAs (HnF is a sports CCA? Go figure) for an AdventureRacez which was mainly doing cool sporty things from Pasir Ris (!!!) to Bedok, about 5km. I got assigned to group 11 which had 5 girls and me. WHY.
So being the natural chicken I was I chickened out and told Ms Teo that my feet were busted up from windsurfing (they actually were, there’s this huge gaping cut on my right foot which isn’t healing). Instead of letting me go home to slack as I had hoped, she sent me to the non-sports team where I hung out with Wang Ce’s group which were a fantastically pleasant bunch (probably because all the jocks were gone and they had people I knew like Rui Hao, Menquan and Jingyi). We had really really nice bonding activities such as building a catapult out of poles and rope (learnt 2 new knots, lots of teamwork), rock climbing and this obstacle course (we all had a chat with the instructor) It was fun but I was really tired to the bone after that. I missed a chance to man up. 🙁
So in the natural order of things, like when heated water boils and scared men scream like girls, tired people go for LAN parties the next day. Obviously. Made some new friends, smashed a glass (very sorry 🙁 ) and rode around in tricycles on Dead Rising 2 while people watching hollered in laughter. It was nice. I didn’t really man up though 🙁
Then today.
Last night I dreamt I kissed someone and felt bad about it because she was taken. I woke up and felt bad about it too. SO DESPO. But I thought it was a cute dream. Blah.
Naturally, people who have fun for a whole day follow it up immediately by rushing off the next day to complete work they should’ve. I went to school early in hopes of meeting the stall owner early, but she wasn’t there. So I called her which I could’ve done at 4pm. Then I went home.
Then I went to Strahan’s house later at 7:10 (I’m a busy man, left home at 5:20) which was pretty damn late, but I was the second to arrive.
The food was great, the atmosphere was good, but everyone was in small groups and doing their own things which wasn’t good for bonding.
But I liked it when we were walking back. Everyone was joking and laughing and there was this big happy mood that surrounded us like the glow of a lantern.
It kind of hit me that I don’t just like being around people, I like interacting with them and building relationships. Listening to Yirui’s interesting theories, Strahan’s death threats, Lixian’s teasing and Bryan’s fear of thrillers really adds to the atmosphere of the whole place. You know, adding character and stuff, things movies and food can’t bring by themselves. I’m liking my class a whole lot more now. 😀
I’m in my cousins’ house right now, lounging on her bed while everyone’s asleep (she’s sleeping with the twins because of me).
